by: Ashley Cunningham
winner of encore’s annual Creative Writing Contest

Doc finger sorts through files with several other cases than mine; several other stories that have bled too heavily through cotton-white pages. I watch his breath fold unto itself while he picks out the right one for me to read myself asleep to. After all these hours disguised as minutes, he pulls my files out and sits them on his desk with a sigh that says many things at once. I can’t tell whether he regrets this whole operation, or he is as happy as I am to get the truth off of his chest.

Looking outside the window, the morning clouds billow into themselves too until I can’t tell the sky from the fog from the flock of birds disappearing in its temporary depth. I feel like I have been awake for years while I have been sleeping. The blur between dreams and reality has taken a firm toe-hold on everything I believe to be true about my world. Every truth that may or may not be dispelled by me reading this black and white definition of myself.

I reach forward with less excitement than raw terror; less enthusiasm and more sheer anxiety. I suppose the pills would help a lot at this point, but, then again, I’m sure they would candy-coat my vision like rose-tinted glasses—too pretty a view to possibly be real. He slides a small fortune of information toward me, and I know from this point on the treasure is mine to spend. The pressure of these vaulted secrets begins to weigh on me until I hear a familiar voice tell me that without pressure there would be no epiphanies; without heavy possibilities, there would be no relief lifted from my shoulders.

And so I cave in. I flip the pages over, holding my tongue back with my teeth so I can taste the moment in all its bitter sweetness. The top line rolls out like a red carpet, displaying “Laura Jordan” like a celebrity headline in one of those overly bawdy tabloids everyone fingers through like animals. My brain is a blank slate, a dirt road with no clear destination. I try to manage the wheels turning over and over inside.

Laura Jordan: Dual Personality Disorder
Attempted Suicide

I look up from myself to find Doc looking me up and down like this paperwork. He waits for a reaction as I try to piece together how I am supposed to act, let alone react. Everything plays like a domino game now, and we both sit stagnant, pausing for the next block to fall and knock down all the others.

I don’t understand what is happening, and yet it is happening all around me without my consent. The whole world spins above me, and I am paralyzed by its immediacy. I feel like I am coming out of a sleep that has driven me to complete stillness, and I see my own face struggling in the salty bell jar of the ocean’s power. Fragmented memories find their way back to me, and I try to place them together in logical order.

I guess the more you understand yourself, the tougher it is to disagree with whatever it is you are doing to yourself. In my case, I don’t understand one single thing, so the argument is quite skewed.

I watch silent picture slideshows of my life play out against the walls of Doc’s office. Everything crowds together and behind the screen showing several different lives in one face.

I am 11, setting the woods behind my house on fire and laughing up at the dirty clouds.

I am 15, posing for a camera I set on self-timer, and puking between the shutter changes. Each new frame is a chance for improvement, I always say.

I am 22 and driving alone in a piece-of-shit car, listening to the sound of waves talk me in and out of their collapsing embrace. There I am, looking over the side of the bridge for Catalina. Hands on the steering wheel, slipping more and more to the right, sliding more and more toward shifty aspirations that will bury me in a watery grave. I remember straining to see how far I would have to fly above the tide to get there. I remember playing tug-of-war with my human instinct for survival. This was a fight I desperately wanted to lose.

I can see the gear shift in third, which is slow enough to cascade through an empty sky and fast enough to make a statement through the cement barriers on either side of the bridge. I can hear myself calling for my father in the same voice that halfway peeks out while I am urgently trying to pull my body out of an immovable state. The whisper-yell of my panic strikes me as I hit cold water. My vocal chords lose their pull the further I sink into immeasurable darkness.

The world hands me a mirror, and I see through the other end of my eyes, watching every last-minute thought of mine race in slow motion. Before I ended up here, before I marched through these bullshit days, I was just a girl who didn’t know what to believe in anymore. I am still a girl who doesn’t know what to believe in anymore.

As the film runs on, I see my own expressions seep into the crevices of the sea. First there is a salty shock. Then there is a momentary exhale in time. I breathe out into the water, releasing bubbles that creep out of my mouth like silent screaming secrets.

I look in my eyes, and my eyes look back into me. For once, it finally makes sense. I am me. And I am Laura Jordan. It seems everywhere I am, my ghost follows, and the haunting memory of what I have turned out to be keeps me from waking up.

by: Tiffanie Gabrielse

The Ultimate Guide to Doggy Fun in North Carolina
By: Suzanne Jalot
OllieDog Media
$5.95

To say it’s difficult being a military wife is an understatement. Our husbands are away for months at a time, and when they are home, there are long hours they must do training or standing duty. More often than not, we wives feel as though we live alone, and our husbands are merely visitors.

It is a sacrifice we make and a hardship we earn the right to complain about. However, there is one family member that, around the clock, never fails to let me know I am loved. There is one family member that warms my heart in the cold night and communicates loyalty, comfort, everlasting friendship and devotion with one look from his giant brown eyes. He is my dog, Zeus. Not limited to military wives without children, a family pet can mean the difference between depression and happiness.

For local editor and publisher of Dog Living Magazine—a bimonthly magazine all about pet health-care tips and interviews with prominent local dog owners—Suzanne Jalot believes dogs are much more than a furry, fluffy and faithful companion. As I will agree, she believes dogs are a pathway into our souls, who deserve much more than a pat on the head. Within her first book, The Ultimate Guide to Doggy Fun in North Carolina, Jalot feels the biggest influence on our dogs is the way in which we live our life with them. Many insist her work is the best travel guide available to steer owners down that fun and rewarding path.

“I started it as a compiled list for my own use at first,” Jalot confessed. “I wanted to do things with my dogs, Ollie and August. I wanted to include them more . . . Then, the more random things I did find that were available to us, the more I thought, This is useful!

“I love to travel with my dogs; they are my two big mutts modeled on the cover of the book. I wanted it to be a reference book for the entire state of North Carolina. It hits the highlights our state has to offer, and there are coupons in the back to use.“

Discussing everything from rules of etiquette for dogs when they play in parks, to the responsibilities owners should remember as they enjoy dinning patios like South Beach Grill at Wrightsville Beach, The Ultimate Guide to Doggy Fun in North Carolina details where to go for dog-friendly accommodations, emergency vets and animal-friendly annual events. Along its pages readers will also be lucky to discover the best-kept secrets of our animal-friendly Port City, such as the Masonboro water taxi to Masonboro Island now welcomes pets to come along for the ride!

Still, why a book solely dedicated to dogs? Perhaps the better question is, why not? Simply put, there’s nothing on the shelves like it. Jalot’s work is the first of its kind. The Ultimate Guide to Doggy Fun in North Carolina is more than a trite idea. Months were devoted to finding answers to our common canine questions, and her research spanned wide across our great state to sniff out the best places to take our pooches. Divided into three main sections for the mountains, piedmont and coast, Jalot’s work is an easy reference guide for those who want to explore not only Wilmington but our entire state.

“The Ultimate Guide to Doggy Fun in North Carolina is also an extension of our magazine.” Jalot explained happily, with her two floppy-eared creative muses by her side. “It’s to promote socialization, responsible dog ownership and awareness. It’s a lot like parenting. One of the life lessons our dogs teach us is they live for you. Their love knows no bounds, and we have to respect that. They cant take care of themselves, they can’t speak for themselves—it’s up to us. Through our pets we can see how to enjoy the little things.”

Available now at Southport’s Cool Dogs, Crazy Cats and Wilmington’s Aunt Kerry’s Pet Stop, Coastal K9 Bakery and Dog Gone Crazy, The Ultimate Guide to Doggy Fun in North Carolina shows us when and where we can expose our dogs to the many great experiences life has to offer. In essence, Jalot’s work should not be viewed as a list of businesses or events that tolerate animals, but rather considered as the dog owner’s bible to enjoying and sharing the world we live in with their four-legged best friends.

by: Shea Carver

Chatham County Line
with Johnny Irion, Zeke Hutchins
and Jay Brown
Soapbox, upstairs
255 N. Front Street
December 18th; 9pm

String after string, Chatham County Line (CCL) make folk music accessible—not that the genre isn’t already, especially in North Carolina. But these Tarheel boys stay tried and true to sounds that bask in rolling hills and vast plains, sunrises above the Atlantic and sunsets behind the Rockies. Their music travels far and wide, tipping its hat to bluegrass and every swiftly played riff that makes up its calling.

Finding Americana came rather naturally to Dave Wilson, whose chief songwriting skills can only be matched by one hefty beard, and impeccable acoustic guitar- and harp-playing. Made up of banjo-picker Chandler Holt, upright bassist Greg Readling and multi-instrumentalist John Teer, CCL has a mash of sound, including traditional acoustic soul punctuated by urban lyricism, and filled out by an alt-rock vibration that keeps them drawing in new audiences, album upon album. Wilson credits the “banjo playing of Jerry Garcia, the songs of Dave Nelson and the voice of Gram Parsons” as part of the impetus to continue polishing the music’s worn veneer.

After four albums, many worldwide tours, including much success in Europe, the men have come back to their roots, North Carolina, to record their fifth studio record. “We’re working on the follow up to IV, which was well-received throughout the globe,” Wilson e-mailed to encore last week. “The record is not titled yet but will be out on Yep Roc Records sometime before the summer heat.”

Comparatively, the release is “an acoustic explosion from deep within the heart of CCL.” According to Wilson, the band is enveloping themselves once again in original tracks, ones that will “touch [their] oldest and newest fans,” in the vein of IV’s “Chip of a Star” and “Country Boy/City Boy.” “We’ve got a great studio in Asheville,” he said, “with a stellar upright piano that Greg is giving a work out as I type.”

Sharing a combined love for playing rhythms and cadences that pull the heartstrings and puncture the political and societal mire of our land, a la Alabama’s days-of-yore racial uproar (“Birmingham Jail,” IV), new songs continue to “keep things interesting and our hands moving,” Wilson noted. Yet, staying on the move has been far from hard in ‘09, as the band recorded an album with Norwegian artist Jona Fjeld, which went Gold in Fjeld’s homeland.

“We were also featured on ‘Later with Jools Holland’ in the UK,” Wilson noted, “alongside acts like Nick Cave, Bon Iver and The Raconteurs. We played a lot of shows and drank a lot of beer.”

The cheers that flowed continue bringing inspiration to CCL as they cradle their strings and spread the old-timey music vibe throughout the globe. “The instruments we play are really beautiful, historic and legendary,” Wilson wrote. “It is an honor to be able to travel, spreading the sound, as well as add to the body of folk music in the world.”

Their escapades have lead them down many a road, encountering the best musicians and writers along the way. Among them is folk troubadour Johnny Irion (husband to Sarah Lee Gurthrie—yes, of Woody and Arlo lineage), whose 2007 album Extempore showcases soulful, steadfast balladry and musical melodies rife with alluring layers of arrangement. Irion will be joining CCL for their annual Holiday Road Tour, which comes to Wilmington’s Soapbox this week.

“We do this show every year in our hometown,” Wilson said, speaking of Raleigh, NC. “[We do a] set of CCL tunes and then a set of holiday favorites, covers, and more CCL tunes played on loud electric instruments. It is really an excuse to show off Greg Readling behind the piano and pedal steel, as well as hang out with some old friends. At this point we’ve been on the road so long, we have a lot of different hometowns, so here we are on the road.”

Also on the bill will be Zeke Hutchins and Jay Brown. “The esteemed Zeke Hutchins, who has been the drummer in our lives for years, was in a band by the name of ‘Queen Sarah Saturday’ with Johnny in their formative days,” Wilson further explained. “He has always been someone who we pass on the highway as we spread our songs across the land. Sometimes we’re in the same town for a night and get to share a tune. This tour is a good way to make sure we’re in the same town for a few nights.”

The tour will feature two sets, an acoustic and electric version sure to titillate all ears willing to travel down the long, dusty road with the band. Jay Brown and Zeke Hutchins will play bass and drums during the electric set, and Irion will be the emcee and most likely sit in for a few ditties. Show starts at 9pm, Friday, December 18th, and tickets are $10 before or $12 the day of.

by: Adrian Varnam

It would seem as if the call for more support of arts education in our nation’s public schools is as old as the schools themselves. Regardless of economic environment or even presidential administrations, the need for more arts funding is always a concern raised by those who understand its importance. But, unfortunately, in a time of near economic crisis, the allocation of more funding at a larger level just isn’t a reality. So one local organization decided to take measures into their own hands and make a real difference in the lives of their community this holiday season.

“I wanted to find a music program that was involved with children that was not only needy—they needed instruments and they needed money for their direction—but had kids who were skilled and actively trying to improve themselves,” Wilmington Unplugged organizer Billy Mellon says. This Saturday, December 19th, his monthly music series will host its second “Super Unplugged” concert at the WHQR gallery in downtown Wilmington. Proceeds from tickets sold will benefit the Williston Middle School music program.

“Originally, we wanted this Super Unplugged to be an opportunity to support the traditional causes this holiday season, like Toys for Tots or buying some needy family some clothes or shoes,” he says. “But then I thought that that was going to leave some kids out. So I thought to help a music program, and I just put it out there as a goal to provide instruments or money to be used within the program. That way we figured more children could use what we help provide for them.”

This kind of altruistic thinking is not new to those involved with Wilmington Unplugged. In fact, it’s becoming an important component of its Super Unplugged concerts, quarterly performances featuring some of the artists who have participated in the monthly showcases. Its first concert helped raise money for WHQR during their fall fund-raising drive, while future productions promise to do the same for other causes, says Jeff Reid, owner and publisher of the The Beat magazine. His local monthly arts publication co-sponsors each Unplugged event.

“The idea to tie in supporting a cause with each performance was kind of based upon the public radio program, etown, which has that same sort of approach,” he says. “It’s a live-music program and they take a cause every week and showcase it. And we really liked that, that grassroots approach. We just felt like it was a good way to mix music and community by showcasing both and we decided that we would try to do the same with Super Unplugged.”

So far, it has been a rousing success. So much so that the number of sponsors, benefactors and supporters of both the monthly series and the quarterly showcase continue to grow with each performance. In fact, this month’s Super Unplugged has already sold out of tickets. Mellon attributes it to not just the quality of the performers but the fact that proceeds are going to such an important cause for young local musicians this holiday season.

“The first Super Unplugged was such a success that I just called up people who went to the first one, told them what we were doing this month with the Williston music program, and they said ‘I’m there,’” he reveals. “We sold 60 tickets in less than three days.”

And the interest in supporting Super Unplugged comes from not just music lovers in Wilmington, but sponsors and donors from all around Southeastern North Carolina. Two in particular, Pam Graham-Wilson from Wilson Family Pharmacy in Wallace, NC, and Varno Musical Instrument Repair in Leland, are contributing by donating directly to the Williston Music Program. The latter is giving a brand-new trumpet to the school while Ms. Graham-Wilson is making a financial contribution. Her support, she says, comes not from a business perspective but from a personal one.

“We are very empathetic to the limited resources for music and the arts in the public schools,” she says. “We have two sons, one of whom is an athlete and the oldest is a musician-songwriter in Austin. The public schools our children attended never seemed to have the resources or commitment to music and the arts. [Our hope in supporting this is] for people to come and enjoy the great local talent we have here in the Wilmington area, and to encourage more individuals and businesses to support music and the arts.”

While those involved with producing Super Unplugged could have chosen any charitable cause to support this December, it was their love and support of music that made this connection a good fit. In fact, Reid draws a direct parallel between the success of Wilmington Unplugged today and the younger generation of musicians he and his partners are hoping to inspire.

“As most of us know, the arts get the least amount of any attention in terms of money, verses sports and things like that, and we just wanted people to realize that even though we’re out there banging on a guitar and singing that it is connected to these band programs,” he says. “A lot of professional musicians, me included, started in school music programs, and so we realize that it’s a nurturing environment, and we wanted to promote that and bring attention to that.”

Hopefully, through the efforts of Super Unplugged and its sponsors and supporters, that attention will make a difference in the lives of our young people.

“I think Billy [Mellon] said it best,” Ms. Graham-Wilson says. “There might be a Miles Davis out there who just needs the opportunity to learn and have access to an instrument. Imagine being the person who provided that opportunity.”

Although tickets are no longer available for the Super Unplugged concert on December 19th, readers can still make a contribution to the Williston music program this holiday season.

“If people want to contribute financially, they can make a check to Williston Middle School Band and mail it to the school [401 S. 10th Street, 28401] with attention to Gwen Wilson,” Williston music director Gwen Wilson says. “If people have instruments collecting dust, they can donate them to the school as well.”

For more information, please contact wilmington.unplugged@gmail.com or The Beat magazine at 910-793-3668.

by: Lauren Hodges

Garbage Art Guild
art reception
Wabi Sabi Warehouse,
19 N. 9th Street
Friday, December 18th; 6-7pm

As the holidays approach, trips to the grocery store never seem to stop; arriving relatives require extra toilet paper, the egg nog is running dry every night, and the tree can’t quite hold enough candy canes. What is one to do with all of those plastic bags? Dixon Stetler has thought of that.

“The girls and I have been using them to make wreaths,” she says.

The “girls” she speaks of are Willa Irvin-Bushman, Sophia Watkins and Clara Santabala: the three trash mavins that make up Stetler’s Garbage Art Guild (GAG). All semester the girls have been hard at work in their after-school meetings, transforming everyday items headed for the landfill into sustainable art. The three students seem destined to carry on Stetler’s artistic legacy, who is known around town for her bike tube mats, the Cameron Art Museum glove tree and those colorful garden hose baskets.

“My main objective was to teach them that art supplies don’t have to be expensive,” Stetler says. “They are all around us, waiting to be used.” One of her first lessons for the GAG was to take the girls to Family Dollar and get them face-to-face with a manager. “Their mission was to get cardboard boxes from him.”

Once they mentioned that the boxes would be used for art, the manager happily obliged. After cutting the boxes into strips, weaving class commenced, and their find for the day resulted in a collection of baskets. “I just thought that was a great way to start, getting the girls to ask permission for supplies. I think it really showed them how much is out there.”

More art supplies arrived in the form of doomed paperback books and old architectural drawings rescued from the trash. The blueprints were made into what the class called “the world’s largest paper airplanes.” As for the books, they were folded back in the shape of cones and covered with glitter to make mini Christmas trees. “We called them ‘conceptual trees,’” Stetler says. “It was just another lesson about looking in odd places for creative supplies.”

In each class, Stetler thought up a new way for her young squires to view the world and its material waste. “Not everything was about trash,” she says. “Some of our activities were learning about waste—meaning things we just don’t need.”

One such activity included a scrapbook of gathered advertisements from catalogs. Each day the girls would bring in clippings of items for sale that they felt humans just didn’t need to survive. “Sky Mall was probably the best and funniest source for that project,” she says. “It was so much fun to see what they would bring in each class.”

The images include gloves with slits for long fingernails and an indoor strip of astroturf for pet waste on especially unpleasant days. “Of course, there were some things they brought in that not everyone agreed were useless,” Stetler says about an advertisement for wrinkle cream. Laughing, she says, “They’re young. It’s all subjective, I guess.”

Until Stetler and her eco-sharp child protegés can come up with an idea for all of the discarded wrapping paper we’re about to use (tsk tsk, people), the public can enjoy their creations at the GAG’s first art reception. On Friday, December 18th, the girls and their garbage will have their time to shine at Stetler’s palace of sustainability, also known as the Wabi Sabi Warehouse. Search for the invite on Facebook Events, and stop by to see what treasures come from others’ trash!